I feel very fortunate to have a strong belief that everything is figureoutable this knowledge has helped me in so many ways. I know that my comfort with being awkward and new is actually unique, and I am grateful for this skill. I encourage you to invest time in being bad at something new, it’s honestly a lot of fun when you recognize the funny and just let go and laugh at yourself.
One thing that helps you have confidence in trying new things is to know smart people to ask for help. This can save you so much time (and embarrassment) and for anyone moving into a new life context it can make all the difference. Successful people get a lot of help from day to day support to truth council wisdom.
Whenever you are stepping into a new context you should ask yourself, what help do I need to be successful. This is THE question that will define your success velocity. I’m sure you will be successful without asking this question but I promise you that your success will be faster when you get the right help.
I don’t care if your new context is physical (a move, return to office, new schedule), professional (a new job or role, new boss, new project), personal (new relationship, family, health) or everything in between you will do better with the right help and support. Taking just 10 minutes to reflect and build an action plan for getting help will pay the biggest ROI toward your success but even more so, it will massively reduce your stress and help you move into your opportunities with more confidence and less fear.
This is a practice – what I mean by that, is that it requires that you do it on purpose and it gets easier over time. It forces you to move away from the protective shield of ego, into the honest realization that you can’t do it alone and might need some help. Successful people figure out what help they need and they sort out who is best equipped to help for the specific thing. Just as you might ask a neighbor for a recommendation for a painter or a plumber, you should know who is good at pointing you to context specific expert. These connectors are the best because they can also make introductions if you need them. When you are not needing help yourself take seriously the opportunity to be a connector for others.
Often a five minute response from an expert can reduce weeks or months (or infinite amount) of flailing alone. I would be remiss if I didn’t also suggest that for me I often get help through research and reading. What a great time to be alive where tools like Perplexity massively speed up this process.
Getting help unlocks your best self, giving help renews energy this is a win/win situation. Challenge yourself to ask for more help do it sooner and in lower stakes situations to build the muscle required. If you are worried about how people will evaluate your own competence when you ask them to help, remember the Ben Franklin effect. People like you more if they have done you a favor and being likeable is a big part of opportunity luck.
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